The Rocking Chair: Ruby's Birth Story


Ruby Anna

Ruby's birth story begins at about midnight on June 15th. I was up late trying to get some last minute nesting things done and planning what I was going to do at school on the last day for teachers (luckily I had most of my things done that needed to be done). I had plans for running a few last errands and baby projects the following day as well. As soon as I laid down in bed the heartburn hit me.. it was serious, so bad I actually thought about running to the bathroom a few times to throw up. Yuck! I laid there agonizing over the sleep I was not getting when finally (after a few tums didn't work) I decided to head to the recliner to try sleeping in an upright position. My mom had stayed the night (luckily!) so that she could watch Leo first thing while I went to work. I did manage to fall asleep around 2:30ish a.m. I woke up around 4 am needed to pee. As a very pregnant person, I debated with myself if I had to go bad enough to get out of the chair, sleep won out and I dozed off again. At about 4:30 I woke up REALLY needing to go. Now this is probably TMI but I started to get up and felt a little tiny bit of wetness. Had I just peed? I couldn't be sure but I knew I needed to get to the bathroom so I stood up and about 4 steps down the hall I felt a gush... (Now a little background my water didn't break until I was about 7cm dilated with Leo so definitely not the same feeling) My first thought again was "Man, my bladder must be about to burst!" Then I thought, "or it could be my water breaking..." two steps later, another gush and so on down the hallway, through my room, and into the bathroom. As I still felt a strong need to pee, I was pretty sure it was my water but I thought I should make sure before waking Evan at 4:30 am. I went to the bathroom and the gushes continued so Evan got an early morning wake-up. As I went to start changing and wake him up... I shook him until he opened his eyes, then I casually said "My water broke." He looked at me with a dazed, sleepy, and confused look as he tried to process what I said, and I again said "My water broke. Ruby's coming, we need to go to the hospital." Well that got him moving much faster after he first asked, "Seriously?" We woke my mom up, packed up a few extras into the hospital bag and headed out the door. I hated leaving without giving Leo hugs and kisses but I had done what I could in the preceding months to prepare him for this day so I left it to God and my mom, with instructions to tell us when he woke up so we could Facetime with him. We were at the hospital by about 5:45 and my contractions had started sometime along the way.

Sidenote: I had extra amniotic fluid so the risk of having a prolapsed cord was higher for me and even more so since only a few days before Ruby had been breech, which also increases that risk. Hence, Evan and I needed to get to the hospital so I could be monitored and in the right place in case of an emergency. At this point I was still hoping for a VBAC and while laboring some at home is generally better, I wanted to be safe in case there was an emergency.

So back to the story... there was not enough staff on at the time to cover the birthing rooms so they kept me in triage for about 3 hours. Evan went and got breakfast, we facetimed with Leo (who had been very upset when he woke up and went looking for us in our bedroom and found Mimi instead but seemed okay when we talked to him via facetime about Ruby arriving), watched my contractions get stronger, and finally we were given a beautiful corner birthing suite that was nice and large. My contractions were strong enough at that point that I couldn't talk through them so in between contractions and bathroom trips I was instructing the nurse and Evan how I wanted the room set up. We had a situation with a broken rocking chair and our nurse went and "stole" a rocking chair from a nearby room with the help of the midwife on call : ) Once the midwife was there, and saw how my labor was progressing, she seemed optimistic about a VBAC... oh I forgot to add that they did a quick ultrasound and determined that Ruby was head down pretty soon after I arrived at the hospital. When your water breaks, the medical professionals try to do as few exams as possible but it was finally time to see where I was in my labor and if Ruby's head was presenting. After a fairly quick exam, I was told that she couldn't really tell how far I was dilated because she had felt something soft and what possibly felt like an eyelash. At the time I did not know what that meant but after calling the Dr. on- call in to discuss and evaluate the situation, he did a quick exam and said he felt what he thought to be a tiny nose. Now the ideal presentation in a vaginal birth is the crown of the baby's head... some babies present with the top of their head or they have other issues but in about 1 in every 500, 0.2% of births, (I know, I love my ability to get in on these tiny statistics in relation to pregnancy and giving birth), the baby presents with their face. Yes... Ruby had her head completely back (back of head resting on her back) and was peering out to see where she was going. This is not an ideal position for the baby to be born in. In addition to her screwy head position she was also sideways and her face was looking out over her left shoulder.

My doctor, who was REALLY great and supportive of what I wanted, gave me two options with the possible scenarios attached to them. He didn't make me feel pressured to choose either way and he seemed honestly willing to do exactly what I wanted. My two options were to choose to proceed with a VBAC, which would entail the Dr having to try and gently push on Ruby's face to get her to pop out of the birth canal and (hopefully) when she reentered she would have her head in a better position. My second option was a planned cesarean section (which would be less traumatic then my emergency one with Leo). If I went for the VBAC they would give me an epidural (bigger needle!), have to do a painful and potentially dangerous adjustment of Ruby (she could come back down in the same position leading to a c-sect, the cord could prolapse leading to another emergency c-sect and there was no guarantee that Ruby wouldn't have some injuries due to all of this, it could also end perfectly and I'd have my VBAC. With the planned c-section they would give me a spinal (smaller needle!) and, typically, recovery times from planned c-sections are better. I would also have a guarantee that I would be awake and hear her first cries and even be able to do skin-to-skin as long as everything was going as planned in there. After a couple of contractions and trying to discuss this with Evan (my mom had also arrived at this point after leaving Leo with Aunty Em), I decided to go with the c-section. I decided, and I am happy with the way things turned out. After my first birth experience, I was traumatized. I am pretty sure I was in some state of shock for the first few weeks. The difference between those first few weeks and these first few weeks were night and day. I felt better after 2 days then I felt after 6 weeks with Leo. I really wanted my VBAC, I REALLY didn't want a second c-section but that's life and I made the decision that felt right to me.

They ushered me into the OR. There was classical music playing, people were moving all around getting set up, the anesthesiologist was getting ready for me (eek!) and my contractions were coming hard and fast, on top of each other and they asked me to sit still for the spinal. I managed to, it was luckily quick but not painless (for those many people who swore to me that I wouldn't even feel or care about the needle while in labor, I beg to differ!) They called out a few numbers, time, my name, why we were there, etc. and Evan was also brought in looking all "Dr. Evan" in his plastic suit ; ).

I was numb up to about my ribs, it felt like anyway, and it made me oh so tired (remember only 2 hours of sleep in a chair)... they drew up the curtain and headed in to get Ruby. After only a short time (maybe five minutes) I heard a cry and they held Ruby just above the curtain (dropping the curtain just a tad) so Evan and I could see our beautiful baby girl. The anesthesiologist helped get my robe unbuttoned so I could do a little skin-to-skin right there on the operating table.

While I was lying there, listening to those first beautiful cries of my daughter, I was imagining how another operating room must have looked 2 and a half years ago; and imagining how it would have been to hear Leo's first cries (cries I learned so very well), and I cried. I believe I healed some of those emotional scars left over from Leo's birth.

After a few minutes, Evan cut the cord and they did the APGAR tests, Ruby was brought to me and held to my chest while I got look at her and kiss her adorable cheeky face and talk to her and let her know that her mama and dada were right there with her. I only got to do that for a couple of minutes before I started to feel like I was going to throw up. I narrowly missed throwing up on Ruby as they didn't hear me the first couple of time I told them I thought I was going to. As I was now out on the skin-to-skin (for the time being), Evan got to take over and have some skin-to-skin time with her (which he prepared for prior to the surgery by not wearing a shirt under his plastic suit). It was amazing to share that time with him as I watched him cuddle our child. I continued to get sick but I was there, I was awake, I didn't miss it. Ruby was (and is!) beautiful and healthy and finally here! After they stitched me back up (and I stopped throwing up) they dolphin lifted me onto a bed, wheeled me back to my room, where they cleaned me up and handed me my daughter, from that moment on we weren't separated.

My silly and lovable family :-)

We were able to talk with Leo not long after and made plans for a same day visit. We were moved to our extended stay closet of a room and got settled in. The first few hours of Ruby's life were spent dozing. attempting breastfeeding, and snuggling her close. Leo, my sister, and nieces were able to come visit around 4 pm that day. We got a great video of Leo meeting his little sister for the first time and boy was he happy to meet her. Pretty early on after meeting her he asked if we could bring her home which we of course said yes just not today and we also broke the news that mama and dada were not coming home either. His sweet little face just crumpled and I felt so bad but he did recover quickly.

Ruby's birth was an adventure (like every birth). Plans were made, and changed... we all came out of the experience healthy and happy, and it reminded me just how lucky I am to have gotten this experience. We are so thrilled to have a second little life join our family.